COUPLE CONNECTION (for couples, friendships, marriage coaching and other significant relationships)

Wherever you find yourself in life with all of its ups and downs, its successes and losses, its stresses, uncertainties and surprises, the presence of significant relationships can be a tremendous source of support and encouragement.

Across the miles and across the centuries, for years individuals had the support, not only of a spouse or ‘significant other’, but also the support of a local clan, village or neighbourhood.
More and more we find ourselves either in larger urban centers or in smaller communities where there is a feeling of anonymity, alienation and aloneness. Traditional support structures may have become severely weakened or wiped out altogether.

Having that one significant other in your life can be VERY key to helping you feel fulfilled, content, loved, accepted, hopeful and purposeful.

But what if that is compromised as somehow you find your relationship crumbling, the fervor of love weakening, arguments and discord increasing and the fear of that relationship completely failing in the near future?

All too often when people find themselves ‘not getting along’, arguing, in discord....what is happening is what I term “the silhouette conflict”. In other words, due to past negative events the landscape of each one’s personal journey often includes:

a) general hurtful stories and events from childhood onwards
b) stories and events that have fed into our feelings of loneliness and isolation
c) stories and events that have eroded our trust in others
d) stories and events that have contributed to our feelings of low self-esteem
e) stories and events that have fed into our fear of abandonment and fear of rejection

Due to the above, when a couple is in conflict, what is in effect often happening is ‘buttons are pushed’ or old feelings are triggered and the individuals find themselves feeling discouraged, helpless and confused in their pursuit of a peaceful relationship. The ‘silhouette conflict’ is the conflict, not so much of the two individuals engaged in the current dispute, but more so of old hurts (the shadow or silhouette lurking beneath; the person’s hidden hurts etc.) where one individual can trigger the old hurts of the other.

Couple Connection involves:
- one or more EFT sessions individually so as to address a) to e) above. This is usually rapid and effective. When you can soften/collapse the intensity of your own past hurts (your silhouette), your chances of being triggered and drawn into unhelpful conflict can be immensely reduced, opening up the channels for peace, constructive discussion, hope and resolution.
- when both are ready, one or more joint EFT sessions with both of you and myself.
If you have ever found yourself in this confusing predicament, why not consider how Emotional Freedom Techniques can help you find peace and integration?